Archive for the 'Motherhood' Category

Sep 16 2010

Blessed

Published by under Motherhood

Today is a good day. Surrounded by the children, looking at them play and even fight, listening to their chitter chatter, I just feel so blessed to have them. No doubt there are bad days, where I raised my voice at them, when they are up to mischief and drive me up the wall. But overall, they are actually very well behaved.

They bring a lot of joy and laughter to the household. I am contented, I won’t trade anything for them. Each and every one of them are my pride.

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Jul 22 2010

Bath Time

Published by under Motherhood

I can’t even spare 10 minutes to shower in peace…usually I have to do a quick shower.

Most night, it is like this :

On top of that I have two older ones either shouting from outside asking me questions regarding their homework or they bring their homework in and ask me if they have done it correctly.

One response so far

Jun 09 2010

Feeding The Prince & Princesses

Published by under Motherhood

It’s hard feeding the prince and princesses. Each of them has their own preferences and liking. Sometimes I wonder if I am too lenient to cater to their demand until they take things for granted.

For example, last night , after WH saw the food on the table, he said “Mummy, why the same same food again. I am bored. Can’t you cook something different??”

I told him to be grateful, at least we have food served on the table. 3 dishes and one soup , some more I steamed an expensive fish last night.

But deep in my heart, I feel guilt. Guilt of not been adventurous in the kitchen. For two years, ever since we shifted from Seremban, ever since hub got his new jobs and rarely comes home for dinner, I have stopped being adventurous in the kitchen. In fact I have let the maid take charge, since she had learned enough dishes to rotate around the week. (Imagine, week after week, we have the same style of food). There’s just so much to do and so little time, since hub doesn’t come home for dinner, since the kids are so fussy, cooking has become the least priority in my list.

Last night , the children flipped through all the cookbook collection and drool over the pages. They plead “mummy, can you cook this, can you cook this” pointing to each pictures. I can only replied , “this one got such such such ingredients, are you sure you are going to eat?” My worst fear is that after I have put in all the hard work and they reject the food simply because there’s some ingredient which they do not eat. That will be a waste. More over, I am on a diet, I do not want to be a “bandaraya” to clear up the food I have cooked and they don’t eat.

Another incident. Last night, JS told me she wanted to bring pancake to school for snack. I told her I have run out of the basic ingredients. She told me to get up early this morning to buy. This morning I couldn’t wake up early. (School holiday..being lazy, woke up at 4.30 tended to her which suddenly had a very bad bout of cough, nurse baby to sleep at 6 a.m) , I only managed to wake up at 9.30a.m. After settling everyone, I told her , can I just make french toast instead of pancake. She pouted her lips and insist on having pancake. So this slave mummy, though grumbling but still couldn’t face the unhappiness of her child, drove out to buy the ingredients, manage to make the pancake, packed into the bento box just in time.

Am I over doing it? Just because my kids pout , I will go or at least try to go the extra mile to please them. Am I spoiling them? Am I teaching the wrong value of not being grateful with what we already have? But as a mother, I will also get worried if they don’t eat, we go the extra mile to cook something that they will eat and find joy in watching them gulping down the food. And their complimented like “Mummy, you are the best cook (even though the food just tasted so so). This food is nice. I love you so much. Thank you for cooking something special today” just make me fly into cloud nine.

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May 27 2010

Bad Day

Published by under Motherhood

Today is a rough day for me. I am DRAINED!!

I have a demanding JE, cranky JL, moody WH and slightly grumpy JS.

Everyone wants something from me, everyone wants to sit besides/on me, everyone wants to have a hug.

If every minute I am taking turn to look into each and everyone whims and fancies is bad, this is even worst, because 2 or three of them are requesting and looking for my attention at the same time EVERY MINUTE. It is NON STOP!!!

JE doesn’t want to be put down when she is sleeping, she wants to be held, the moment I put her down, she wakes up. When she is awake, she doesn’t let me sit. She wants me to hold her upright and walk or stand. My poor back…. it’s so pain now. She is crying a lot today too. Worst is she doesn’t want kakak or daddy.

My head is going to burst now!

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May 12 2010

A Typical Night

Published by under Motherhood

We spent our weekday nights at the study area. It’s always bustling with activities and chatter.  I try to do some surfing in front of the lappy when they are doing homework ( I never get to read on paragraph or even type a full sentence without being interrupted). On nights that I really need to concentrate and coach them, I shut of laptop off and give them full attention.

JL is always sitting beside me, flipping her books, scribbling, coloring or sitting on my lap asking me everything on she sees on my screen.  JS sits to the right of me and WH to the far end.

WH always asks a lot of questions, always questions unrelated to what he is writing/homework. Sometimes he sings, recites 中华字经 while writing. JS sings while she does her homework and stops in between writing to gossip/tattle about her school friends.

There’s also non stop of  “mummy this ” and “mummy that”

From WH

“Mummy, how to draw man dancing?”

“Mummy, where is my pencil?”

“Mummy, where is my eraser?”

“Mummy, correct or not?”

“Mummy, got enough space or not?” (Spacing when doing copy writing)

From JS

“Mummy, this one correct or not”

“Mummy, I don’t know how to do this?”

“Mummy,teach me teach”

“Mummy, pass me my dictionary”

JL

“Mummy, can you read this book to me?”

“Mummy,  I want ng ng”

“Mummy, where is the cover”

“Mummy….”

There’s always non stop of “mummy”, almost every second, almost non stop from each of them.  I’ve lost count how many times they call out the word “Mummy” in a day and certainly lost count of how many times I have heard it in a day.

2 responses so far

May 11 2010

Mother’s Day Cards

Published by under Motherhood

Craft done at school from WH. This is his best effort in rolling the crepe paper and cutting.

Comes with this origami fish

With love notes inside.

The boy spent 2 weeks on this project. He’s been telling me that they are doing something in school but acted secretive. He brought it home on Friday but told me that I can only open the note on Sunday. Anyhow, he got impatient and too excited and by Friday itself, he already got me to open the note.

JS’s card from school. She brought it home on Wednesday. ( I remember it is Wednesday,because she has got music lesson)

Just minute after she gave me the card, she throws a tantrum that turns into an emotional outburst.  I was mad at her, but I tried to control my own emotion. No point shouting at her. Told her firmly she has to cool down and I am leaving her to cool down . Brought the three younger ones downstairs for a breather. (Actually just outside for a walk) . I can’t stay back and listen to her yelling, I know I will surely get into an outburst myself and whack her.

I still remember hearing her said “I made a card for you from school and yet you still don’t love me” (That was when I told her I am going out to cool down)

The same night after she has calmed down, she made me another card note

Such embarrassing note. As if I am really that fierce and scold everyone none stop. My tone may be stern and I nag, but to her it is scolding. Loving her is talk to her in nice sweet gentle tone, loving her is to hug and hold her and talk nicely to her when she throws tantrum. Well, I still not able to do that but I am trying to control my own emotion and so far so good. (except the nagging part – well actually it has lessen too)

Friday night, she made me another one. In fact she made a few (one for Ah mah, one for  Po Po, and one each for both her Gu Ma)

I asked “Why your “D” like that?”  She said “This is special design”

One response so far

May 05 2010

Challenge

Published by under Motherhood

Motherhood is the greatest challenge in life. Every single stage of the child’s growth is a challenge and it gets tougher and tougher. As a mother, you don’t stop worry and concern about your child even though they are already in their adulthood until the day you died. Being a mother of a baby and toddler, before they go to school, the challenge is nothing compare to when they are in school. There’s behavioral, health as well as development matters that always pops out. Academic performance is already becoming secondary when those problem surface.

JS is having bouts of emotional outburst and other pre-teen behavioural problem.

WH though show a lot of improvement in academic work (which earlier I was so worried he is dyslexic) but still is my worry.

Today I found out a new term, dyspraxia which some of the symptoms matches WH’s. I am hungrily looking for more info and digesting it. I am wondering if he is at the mild side of dyspraxia and dyslexia.

When I am busy reading. I heard hub scolding him “Why you so clumsy?” . Apparently he knocked on JL again. I need to go do more finding.

ps:  I feel quite alone. Because each time I talk to hub, he thinks I over react, he brushes it off. I am the one who spend most time with WH and I have studied child development and I know how to observe WH but he choose to ignore hoping that there is no problem.

2 responses so far

Apr 15 2010

Formula Milk Vs Fresh Milk

Published by under Motherhood

The two older kids literally stop taking FM about 1 1/2 years ago after I weaned them off from the sippy cup. I did not intentionally wean them off from the sippy cup, that was the only source they could drink the FM from.  I couldn’t find those white replacement spout for the sippy cup and the ones we had were worn out and stained. I tried getting them drink the FM from the cup just like how they do it with water and juices, but they rather not drink. They used to be milk buckets, taking at least 4 times of 6 – 8 oz milk per day. We used to be able to finish 1 can of 1.7kg milk per week. (very costly as one can is about RM79 then and the price has gone up now).

They started drinking cold fresh milk, but not as much as when they were taking the FM from the sippy cup.  WH is still taking one cup a FM a day before he goes to school and just a week ago, he started asking for a cup before bed. As for JS , she rarely drinks FM now.

As for JL, I tried to introduce FM to her using the cup when she turns one. On good days, she would drink, but only 1 cup a day. By the time the two older siblings were weaned off from sippy cup, she hasn’t turn 1 and was still exclusively on breastfed. So when it was time to introduce FM for her as supplement, she didn’t have any role model to follow. She likes her older siblings drink fresh milk from cup and dislike FM. Even that, some days she asks for more, some days she just doesn’t want any.

A friend of hub who is into health products and has three kids his own knew that our kids don’t drink FM. He was telling hub that children should drink FM and fresh milk is not good for them and bla bla bla all other things. Hub came to question me if our children is still drinking FM.

I told hub they prefer fresh milk and to me if they don’t want FM, it is better for them to drink fresh milk rather than not drinking at all.

My FIL is another one that is concern. Each time he sees us and the children, the first thing he asks is if they are drinking milk (as in FM…other milk is not good enough). If he knows they are not, he will give reminding them that they have to drink and he looks worried.

I just don’t know why we Asian are so bought to the idea that FM loaded  with all kind of supplements an As (DHA , SA and whatever A and not) is better than fresh milk. All I know is that the Caucasian ,  in the States, Australia and even Europe.. kids grew up drinking fresh milk . FM is just for infant and baby. Even toddler drinks fresh milk.

So what is so wrong of drinking fresh milk, as long as my children are eating a balance and healthy diet. Why does it have to be FM and not fresh milk? Afterall , they come from the same source…the cow.

10 responses so far

Mar 29 2010

Help Me Stop Nagging

Published by under Motherhood

I find that I am nagging and scolding more lately to the two school going kids. Almost everyday from day to night surely there’s something they do that makes me upset and wants to nag. How come I failed to see the beauty in them , how come I failed to see their strength and goodness, home come all I see now is just there weak and bad side.

I hate nagging and scolding but I can’t help it. There is no words of encouragement comes out. I want to keep motivates and encourage them in a positive way, but instead my intonation and the words I am using , I think I am slowing putting their esteem and confident down and am slowly making them feel inferior. I hate this and I want to stop it. I want to be positive with them , but I failed. Everything they do is not up to my expectation and approval, I keep criticizing.  I am really afraid that I am really slowing building a way between them and me that they don’t want to talk to me and find confident in me anymore. I want to be their friend, I want to talk and listen to them.

I want to stop this before they starts (and they already have) speak like me. They are using this kind of intonation to one another , including JL to her brother and sister.

It makes me feel really down and lousy. How come I am such a lousy mom. Why can’t I be more loving and patient and don’t nag. I love them, love them so much, but why can’t I do so physically and verbally. Why must I keep nagging and scolding till they feel so unloved. Why have I failed so badly again.

3 responses so far

Jan 26 2010

Busy

Published by under Motherhood

I am back on my night duty to coach the kids on their homework just like before I gave birth. Feeling so left out from the school work after 4 days break. Hope will be able to keep up the pace.

Life with 4 kids can be busy.  I wish I can spilt into 4 sometimes when everyone seems to have an urgency and need my attention. Luckily mum is still around now, when mum leave after my confinement, I hope I can keep sane and cope with their demand.

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Words Of Wisdom

You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth

~ Khalil Gibran, The Prophet


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