Archive for the 'Me' Category

Jan 06 2013

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I have only worked three days and I am already off of the next 6 weeks. The boy that I babysit had gone back to Taiwan with his family for Chinese New Year break. My babysitting job will only resume mid of February. It rather suits me well as I have lots of work to do. Kids schedules to be arranged and sorted (when extra curricular kick in), most importantly I need to prepare for CNY.

I have just only started spring cleaning the house. Sending carpets and cushion covers for dry cleaning. Next mission will be the curtains and then the baking.

After three days, the kids seem to have enough of me working.

This is what JE said to me

“Mummy, why the boy always come our house wan?”

Me ” because his mummy has to work and I help to look after him while his mummy at work”

“But I don’t like. He sits my baby chair (car seat)” “After he beat me how? ” “After he wants to sit on your lap how” Both are already fighting for my attention. Initially I really thought JE is so generous to share her toys and me. But looks like she has had enough. On Friday, while we were playing, I went a little overboard teasing the boy. Out of the sudden he became so insecure, started crying and looking for his mum.

On Friday afternoon, while we were in the car

JL said ” I don’t like the boy. He makes me sad.” I asked why. She said  to me “He always make you work”

I told them about sharing, taking turns and that if I don’t work, then I won’t have money to spend , and the most ideal now is that I work and can still be home with them.

Let’s see how it goes when the boy comes back in Feb.

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Jan 02 2013

My Three Days Babysitting Experience

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You might think I am crazy inviting more trouble and stress for myself. Being a weekday single mum, having four kids of my own to care off without maid (which mean I job scope range from cook, maid, cleaner, driver, tutor, nurse, finance minister etc ), being a blogger, active in FB scheduling activities for my kids and running a Wikki business, volunteered in a Monthly story telling activity which requires meeting and preparation and now Babysitting!? Part of me just yearn to do something. I need to find something to boost my confident. I need to search back my value and self worth  (though my mum disagree , saying that staying home as a mum , raising my children well, is all my worth and value unmeasurable my money).

So the boys were here for a trial from 26/12 – 28/12. They arrived at 8.30 each morning and the mum came to pick them at 5.30pm

They are lovely boys, especially the younger one. But boys being boys they are active and mischievous. My boy temperament is very much like his dad, very quiet and demure type.. hence I have never had much heart attack or hair pulling moments mothering him. But these boys are otherwise.

The first day, the older boy were rough. Few occasion , getting over excited and carried away during play, he pinned down on WH during a rough play. He hurt WH a few times and my poor boy did cried a little.  I notice these boys like to smash and throw things too.  They are forever touching the things in my house.

Second day, my PIL and SIL dropped by in the morning for a while. They saw the boys. They were worried. They particularly do not like the older boy which they think he is rude, ill manners and VERY naughty. FIL was worried that he will be a bad influence to my children. They have doubt if I shall proceed and question my ability to handle the boys.

Third day was the same. But I had warned the older boy earlier for not being rough, we set stricter rules.  My  older kids entertain the boy well, especially JS , she is like a little teacher teaching the older boy craft.

Actually at the end of the second day, my intention to continue already started shaking. I have doubt if this is worth it at all. But I do not want to give up easily. I do not want to feel like a failure and I am so arrogant to admit my incapability. How can it not possible for me to handle six kids? How could it be for me not able to control two wild active children? How could I?? There will be no easy money/reward, everything needs to be invested with effort. Don’t think babysitting is such simple job. It could, if I park the kids in front of the TV throughout the day, but that’s not my style. I don’t encourage my own children to watch TV, I don’t entertain them with TV, how can I do it to someone’s kid?

The pro of having the boys around:

- To show my children that we need to put in effort to earn a decent income. Their mummy needs to work in order to provide their needs

- Maybe with two boys, it can toughen WH up a little.

- It has proven that JS is very capable little teacher and babysitter and a very great help. Very mature for her age in looking after young ones.

- My four kids stick together and care for each other when they are bullied

- They can pick up speaking Mandarin, especially for JL and JE.

- JL and JE is very good at taking care of the little boy. Instill some responsibility in them

- Being a babysitter, I get some pocket money, I get at “JOB” at the same time still be home for my children. There is no other better arrangement than this.

- JE get to have a playmate.

Cons:

- The house is messier and dirtier. The younger boy drools a lot. He can’t sit at one place to eat and spill all over

- They are rough, I am afraid that one day they might break things in the house. The older boy just suka suka pry open my auto gate. He threw ball at my grill , the mosquito netting were out of place

- They are rough, super rough

- The younger one likes to touch things. My hubby is very particular with the orientation and placing of all the ornaments at home. He is meticulous and fussy with cleanliness. I might need to call the part time cleaners in twice a week instead of one.

- I lost some freedom. I may not be able to go for lunch date , shopping with my girls after school. It may be impossible for us to skip school to go for homeschool outings too.

- I can’t go Yoga in the morning as planned

- I may not have freedom to go for massage and facial during weekdays when the boys are around.

- The older boy, I don’t trust him. He may sneak out things from our house. I caught him that day while playing with WH’s lego, trying to put something in his pocket. I asked him what he had in his pocket. He pulled out a piece of WH’s lego instruction paper. What else he has there in his pocket and how much had he taken out of the three days I did not know. I don’t want to invite thief into our house.

see…when one have money, one lost freedom and time. There’s really no best of both world

The last draw was on Friday evening , when the mum came to pick the boys. While we were not watching, the older boy poured half a bottle of fish food into the fish pond. We only realize it shortly after they left and we spent almost two hours cleaning the pond and we lost a few fishes. I was really mad and in rage with the boy’s action.  At that moment, I told myself enough is enough. Hubby also thought it’s not worth. We rather have some peace and quiet in our house and not have bad influence to our kids. Seriously the money is good to have but not totally worth.

I called the mum on Saturday morning telling her my decision. She begged me to look after the younger one as she can’t find any suitable candidate within a short notice. Pity her on that , I promised to look after the young one till she finds someone else.

The little one is here now, I am still blogging and will off for cooking lunch soon. And i am in devil mode to him now. He better obey!

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Jan 02 2013

Babysitting

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Babysitting had never been in my priority consideration as a job. Perhaps I find it less glam than working outside the home. Anyone can be a babysitter. An auntie with not much of an educational background Can be a babysitter. I refused to be grouped like one. But since I haven’t got a chance to get out of the house to work, I started toying on the idea of becoming a babysitter too. I reckon if I can handle my 4 children with ease and that they are quickly growing up and have been very helpful, having another extra one or two kids at home shouldn’t be too much for me to handle. I reckon I can be a babysitter of a different, an Executive  Babysitter, just like the one taken care JS when she was a baby.

I had my criteria. I do not want to look after newborn due to my schedule where i need to be out of the house chauffeuring the kids. I prefer toddler to preschoolers where they come after school for a few hours.

Just a week after the school called me a teaching job, my friend also text me asking me if I am interested to look after two boys. They are brothers. One slightly younger than JE and the older boy is a few months older than JL. Perfect age for me. As the older boy is supposed to be here for only 2 hours daily after school. They are offering me slightly higher than market price due to my educational background. It will be more lucrative offer than what they school can offer me after deduction of the kids schooling fees. After discussing it with hubby and the kids, we decided to give it a try first without commitment.

The mum brought the boys over for three days before Christmas Eve to get use to my place. They came in the afternoon for three days , staying for an hour together with their mum. I can see that they are active and mischievous boys. The first evening they were here, my three older kids werent around. My son seems very serene and quiet. The mum wanted to see my kids and hence I brought the kids ome the next day to meet with my prospective “client”. My children were polite and friendly which had left good impression to the mum.

This family is Taiwanese. Mum used to be SAHM but had decided to take up a teaching role offered by the International School. (So very similar to my situation where I had wanted so badly to go back to teach but at the end hold back because of my children) She used to be child development physiologist (or something similar) at the hospital back in Taiwan. Though she is working in school, but their timetable and schedule does not follow the malaysia calender. She wanted to drop the kids over on Christmas eve, but I told her I won’t be around as I will be celebrating Christmas as well.

The boys came over on Boxing day and for three days there were at my home full day. Imagine having 6 kids at home at that time. My hands are tight, I didn’t have time to finish off clearing the house in prepare of school opening and new year. (I did it last minute on the new year long weekend break).

Here to a new chapter of 2013… I am may venturing into the journey of babysitting

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Jan 01 2013

Job Offer

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Sometime earlier in December last year, the principal of JL’s kindy called to ask if I am keen on taking up a teacher’s post. It has been my dream since I took up the ECE course years ago to work with children. I wanted to apply what I have learned with the children. I want to experience if the philosophy that I have learned work with other children other than mine. I want to challenge myself if I am able to put what I’ve learned into practical.

However over the years, I have not gotten the chance as my children needs me more. It hasn’t been a right time but this new year, I feel that I am more ready and perhaps some adjustment can be made to realize my dream.

I didn’t make up an immediate decision. I told her I will give it a thought and get back to her later. I briefly spoke about it to hubby. His reaction is always “What about our children? JE is still too young” I told him “we can always do bla bla bla…”

Three weeks later after the call, I brought all the children along to the preschool to settle the new school term fees for JL and at the same time trying to find out more about the job scope as well as the remuneration package.

The basic pay ( I didn’t ask for the other benefits) as a half day preschool teacher is RM1K plus , less than RM1.5K. Working hour is from 7.45a.m till about 1pm. But for my case, it’s flexible and I can work out with the other teachers to stay back twice a week until 1pm. Other days I can leave at 12.30pm

I told the principal my kids are all in different schooling session. I need to chauffeur them around. And my main concern is WH who will be the only one in afternoon school session. Shall I be working, I need to put him in daycare. The principal told me they had daycare service for primary school children and currently there are 4 of primary school going kids placed in the Taska. Teacher C will be the one in charge of them guiding them on homework as Teacher C’s daughter who happened to be WH’s classmate is also there.

I told the principal I actually do not have intention to let JE starts school early, though she can as she will be 3 comes end of Jan. Shall I be working, JE will have to start school early. Therefor I will have two preschool going kids and one that needs to be sent to daycare. I told the principal that whatever I earn shall worth the sacrifices that I made on my children. She quickly told me that my preschoolers will enjoy a 50% off of school fees (taking note that each is RM330 per month) and the daycare charges is RM500 and that she can’t give me a discount. That’s no good…which mean after paying the kids fees, I probably left nothing much from the salary she offered. It’s not of a win win situation at all. Which mean I earn so little and at the same time scarifying my kids especially for WH and JE , where they shall and can have a much better conducive environment, well taken care off and have much personal attention from me than in the school and daycare. Shall I go for the few hundred bucks and sacrifices them? It doesn’t make sense at all. After weighing this in my mind, I told her principal that I give it a further thought (I have actually another offer and I just want to weight which is more worth to go for)

Right after we got into the car, I received a text in my phone. JS text me “Mummy, do you really want to work? Please dont” I then asked WH “is it ok if I send you to daycare while I go to work in the morning?” He refused.  I told him “It doesn’t have to be this daycare , we can go to other daycare, how about that?”
Still he did not agree.

We then talked about how we feel, what makes them feeling so, what they see, their opinion and such. I feel that in whatever decision I made and going to make, it is not just a decision between hubby and me. I respect my children’s feedback as well. In this case, though I have made up my mind, but I still want to listen to what they have to say.

We have been with this school for 4 years and this will be the fifth, starting with WH enrolling in the school when he was 5. I used to be quite happy with the school and I had recommended it to friends who asked about preschool selection, however i started feeling otherwise since last year. Some of my friends who visited the school after my recommendation were disappointed with it. (claiming it to have lousy daycare, dirty, fierce daycare teacher and kakak ..bla bla bla) but I must admit, their asset is their teachers. They do have a few good dedicated teachers, however starting last year, the age 5 class teacher changed and i wasn’t too happy with these new teachers. I continue letting JL attending this preschool because she is going to have one very dedicated teacher to be her class teacher. Teacher Ann is very very good and gentle. I don’t know where to look for such quality teacher else where. She is in charge of the K2 class. But I have started to make plan to do a school hunt end of this year for JE who will be preschool ready in year 2014. I no longer have confident with this current preschool for their K and K1 classes.

What made me lost confident in the principal was also partly what she told me. She said she needs to look for a Montessori teacher to in charge of the Montessori area for the 5 years old. She said she had attended a seminar during the school holidays and realize that more parents are into play through learn and not looking for academic learning. Hence she has renovated the place and set up a Montessori room. Well, all these year the school had claimed to be Montessori (But I know they are probably 30% montessori). I felt that if she is a true Montessorian, she should have stick to the philosophy since day one, and not change strategy to meet market and parents demand and now that knowing there is a demand in Montessori and even Waldorf, trying to switch back to cater to that.

So here, what my children told me.

- Mummy, the school is so stinky.  So there have noticed it too. I tried to keep mum when I enter the school to pay fees the other day. The whole area upon nearing the entrance had this strong stench of toilet. It wasn’t like this before when JL was there in year 2011. When we were there, there were a bunch of children around (those who stays for daycare service, even during school holidays)

- Mummy, they are watching TV .

- Mummy, the kakak so fierce.

When were there the other day, we arrived about 12.30pm. The kids were seated on the floor, facing the small laptop watching youtube. Since the principal was entertaining another parent, we waited for a while. 10 – 15 minutes later, the teacher switch off the laptop and the kakak ushered all the children for their milk session. Some drinking milk from cup, most drinking from bottle and they just lie down on the tile floor without any mattress drinking milk, some even lay in front of the stinky toilet having their milk. The tone the maid (kakak) talk to the kids is commanding and fierce. That put my children off. The kids were then ushered upstairs for nap (that’s just shortly after or before 1pm).

I am very saddened to see the condition of these kids in the daycare.  I vowed to myself that I will never put any of my children in this condition. The lifestyle there in the daycare is so rigid and military.  For once I feel so lucky that my children can and are growing in a much loving and gentle environment. I don’t know if all daycare service are like that, perhaps not. But I believe majority of them which are profit minded are.

For the time being, I have written off this school from my list to seek for job in future. It is still too early to tell if I will send JE there for K2 class under Teacher Ann, but I am definitely going to start school hunt end of this year for a new school for her and when I more ready to take up a teaching job, I will look somewhere else rather than this one.

 

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Dec 30 2012

Last Day Of 2012

Published by under Me

A year had gone by so quickly, so as the 7 weeks long school holiday. It’s about time to get back to school already. Tomorrow, JL will be the first to be back in school. She will be attending her kindy’s orientation day. This will be her last year of preschool.

We, the children and me were very busy with outings and activities the whole school holiday until we did our  back to school preparation very last minute. We hardly have the time to do so. I only started yesterday, ironing they new school uniforms, sorting out and put away their old clothes and old uniform and today all I did was declutter and rearrange the study area. Was suppose to wrap their new text book too, but I hardly get the time. Lucky JS took the responsibility to wrap her own books and she did a very good job on that.

It’s time for me to readjust my body clock to wake up early again. During the school holidays, our schedule had gone hay wired. On days that we did not have activities that required us to travel far, we all woke up almost near noon and skipping breakfast on days we woke up late. Now it’s about getting back in routine again and I have new challenges to meet as well.

Two more days before school officially reopen, two more days for me to finish off some minor chores in prepare of new school term.

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Dec 28 2012

Dyspraxia/Dyslexia

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Many of my friends and blog readers know that my son is dyspraxia and dyslexic. Lately I started wondering if he gets this bad genes from me. I know I am never good at sports. When I was younger, I was always very awkward with my movements when doing sports. I get very low self esteem and self conscious and tried avoiding sports all together. Lately I notice i am actually quite butter finger as I easily knock on someone and spilled. It seems to have gotten worst this last few years especially when I need to juggle between so many kids and get the things done fast. At the same time, I find that I can compose an article as fluently as before. It started when I slow down in blogging four years ago. I may be composing a post in my mind, but when it’s time to type it out, I can’t arrange it in a proper sentence, something just got jumbled up and stuck in my mind. Worst is that I typed out words that I don’t meant to type. I may think of one word, but I typed out something totally unrelated. Often when I read back what I have typed, it doesn’t make sense and I don’t even know what I am trying to write. I get very frustrated with it. Why am I going through these at this age? I never have problem with essay writing when I was in school. These recent experience seems to be showing me the frustration that my son is going through. It’s like having myself in his shoes. It certainly does not feel good.

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Dec 28 2012

New Year New Challenge

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I don’t want to make any new year resolution besides hoping to lose another 10pounds but I am looking forward to the new year. I have new challenge waiting for me. There are things that I have wanted to do for so long and finally I am taking the first leap and doing it. I am very excited about it knowing that I get a chance to learn what I want to learn. There are a lot more that I want to do, but am taking small steps now and am just so happy that I even managed to take that one first small steps. Hurray to year 2013!

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Dec 28 2012

Counting My Blessing

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2012 is drawing near the end. It has been a good year for me. I don’t know how much I have achieved on my 2012 new year resolution, but I feel that spiritual and EQ wise, I have grown so much. I feel much contented and happy. I am counting my blessing to have met people who has inspired me. Though I may not have met them personally, but through their sharing in facebook, I am inspired and I learned from them to be a better person. I realize that if I am calm and happy, the whole family atmosphere will be calmed and happy too. My relationship with my children improved and strengthen, so as my relationship with my hubby. Generally ,it has been a very good year. I am looking forward to another good year ahead.

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Dec 18 2012

Demanding Customer

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The toughest part of running a business is dealing with demanding customers who expect top grade and the fastest service for a meager amount they paid. I don’t have a bubbling business yet, just a very small scale one but I have met customer like that.

Well, I tried as much as possible to sent out the package the moment I receive the money, but there are times that I just can’t avoid the delay. I received an order late on Friday night, which I suppose to post it out by Saturday, if the money is already in. But last Saturday, there’s an activity for the children, which we need to leave home very early , before the post office open, and by the time we got home it was very late already. Obviously we missed posting out the order. The following day was a Saturday and very obvious, there’s no post service. Monday , we left home very early again for another activity in Cyberjaya, by the time we finished and dropping the kids at their aunt, it was about 3pm with heavy downpour (thunders and lightnings) , it was quite impossible for me to drag along baby to park go to the post office. I gave up the idea of even stopping over. Now, I posted out the first thing this morning and mailed out the tracking number to the customer and straight away, I got bombarded by the customer for posting the order out only today.

I am not giving excuse of not delivering on time, I have tried my best..

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Dec 18 2012

Just Me & Baby

Published by under JE,Me

After our activities this morning, I dropped the three older kids at their aunt’s for sleepover. BIL will be back from The States tomorrow and the kids want to go fetch him from the airport. They planned to spent three nights there and will only be back by Thursday. They are very fond of BIL, as JS just told me recently “Mummy, you know,  my love for Uncle Fred is just like how much I love daddy and you”

By the way, this is the very first time that the house is left with just baby and me. Yup. Just the two of us until the kids are back. Unexceptionally quiet.

There are actually tonnes that I can do, and yet with so much freedom , peace and quietness, I do not know what to do first. Shall I watch TV? Shall I sleep early? Shall I be sorting and backing up my photos in the pc? Shall I blog? Shall I do some crafts? Shall I read? Shall I go complete some backdated pc work? Or just wasting time simply surfing then net?  Shall I go get my hair done in the morning or shall I go massage?  but for sure, I am going to BBW without the three kiddos.

I was doing some ironing just now after dinner, JE suddenly asked me ” we go fetch korkor jiejie after this? ”

I told her “No, they are not coming back tonight”

And after one hour when I nearly completed my ironing, she asked again “Why we are not going to fetch jiejie leh?”

Looks like she is missing her brother and sisters already. Having no playmate around to play with her and the sisters to pamper her

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Words Of Wisdom

You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth

~ Khalil Gibran, The Prophet


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