Maria Montessori discovered that children are at their height of sensitivy to order at the age of 1 to 2. She stated that a child shows the need for order in several ways:

1. He shows a positive way in seeing familiar things
2. Children insistence on putting things back in their place
3. Crying or throwing tantrums to unfamiliar places or people

She cited on example:

“I found myself one day with a group of people going through Nero’s grotto at Naples. With us was a young mother with a child — about one and a half years old – too small to be able to walk the whole length of the way. In fact after some time the child grew tired and his mother picked him up, but she had overestimated her strenght. She was hot and stopped to take of her coat to carry it on her arm, and with this impediment once more picked up the child, who began to cry, his screams growing louder and louder.

His mother strove in vain to quiet him, she was plainly tired out and began to grow cross. Indeed the noise was getting on the nerves of all, and naturally others offered to carry him. He was passed from arm to arm, struggling and screaming, and everyone talked to him and scolded him, but he only grew worse.

I thought of the enigma of infancy, of how reactions must always have a cause: and going up to the mother I said, “Will you aloow me to help put on your coat?” She looked at me in amazement, for she was still hot; but in her confusion she consented and allowed me to help her on with it.

At once the baby quieted down, his tears and struggles stopped, and he said “Mamma, coat on.” It was as if he wanted to say, “Yes, Mamma, a coat is meant to be worn”, as though he thought of it, ” At last you have understood me” and stretching out his arms to his mother he came back to her all smiles. The expedition ended in complete tranquillity. A coat is meant to be worn, and not to hang like a rag over one arm; and this disorder in his mother’s person had affected the child as a jarring distrubance”

I can totally relate to the above incident that Maria Montessori had encountered. A few weeks ago, we were having dinner at BSC and the restaurant was quite cold and since I was having a flu, I brought along a sweater. The moment I put it on, WH made a great fuss and tried pulling my cardigan. Remember what I have read in the book, I know he’s showing his sensitivity to order and I quickly took off my cardigan and he was all smile and happy , though the grandparents and aunty kept telling him that he should let mummy put on the cardigan.

The same thing happened again last weekend. SIL and me were out shopping for cloths, while I was changing in the fitting room, each new piece of cloth I tried on, WH is wailing and crying out so loud and he gave me such a pitiful look with so much tears flowing. ( I felt a little embarrased !) SIL was jokingly saying that he’s such a “jakun” and “sakai” , of course I knew the reason of him behaving so, all I could do was to cut short the fitting time and quickly choose 2 pieces of new cloth and quickly put on my cloth. After that he was all quiet and happy, running around in the shop. If I have not known about Montessori philosophy, if I have not known about the sensitivity to order, I guess I would be loosing my patient and get very irritated by his behaviour. I’m so glad that I have the knowledge and be able to understand what’s in his little mind.

Not only these 2 incidents , I also realize that he’s able to keep his all the things back to the original place and also the sequence on how he arranged his toy cars. (earlier posts- here, here)

Montessori noted that :

the child has a twofold sense of order. First is external, his relationship with the environment and second is internal; an awareness of the different parts of his own body and their relative. The need for order is evident in the child from about 1.5 years. During this period, the child manipulates his environment and moves objects from one place to another.

Order consists of recognising the place each object in relation to his environment. It is not objects in place that he is identifying through his sensitivity to order but the relationship between objects in the environment.

The child’s need for order is different from that of an adult. Order provides an adult with a certain amount of external pleasure. But for the child, he needs order in the environment because he is constructing himself out of the element of the environment.

So mothers with young babies out there, if your child started to fuss and cry for no apparent reason, please do not blame the child and get irritated, but first check out what is new in the environment or was there any changes …maybe it’s your new hairstyle, a new perfume or a new dress that has cause a little disturbance in your little ones…..we adult have to be sensitive to our child’s cues as well.